Just a few months before my debut solo show and I have
decided to give a few of my precious days to volunteer work. Something that an
artist myself who should be focusing on her artworks bothered to do for the
goodness of mankind, of my people, Buddhism, and my country. If only in very
little amount.
Volunteer work is of course, not for everyone. Especially
in a country where working in itself is such great labor that having a job that
is stable is nothing short of a blessing. I, on the other hand after living in
a temple thought that I could do some good deeds by providing my talents.
Volunteer work makes a lot of people happy, because if
you are not going to be paid for it, your mind better be strong enough to
handle every setback, and still feel this sort of contentment and satisfaction at
the end of the day.
Currently, I am volunteering for a temple that has the
ambition to provide free education for everyone, which is of course a great
thing. Now that it’s going to begin the college this month of June, there are a
lot of things that hasn’t been straightened out first.
A lot of things are slow and now that I’m inside it, I
finally see why. It is not because they are shorthanded and or there are not
enough volunteers. I could see that there are little things that can be done by
the already available people in it to work on and yet no one acts on it.
I help out when I can. They have a nice and spacious gallery
and yet, Manila doesn’t know it exists and they are not really doing much about
it as long as they reach a handful, it is enough. The potential of having a
higher reach is not achieved because maybe they are content of the people who
are coming in. I was invited by the one managing the gallery to provide a few
of my artworks and sell it during an on-going exhibit. So I made works that are
related to the gallery’s theme, like the face of the Buddha and an abstract
representation of a lotus. Apparently, what was demanded of me after submitting
the artwork was common and recognizable images of the lotus flower. Not only
was it demanded of me, but when I gave my price for the artworks, I was also
told that it would not sell because the price is high.
In all honesty, the price is 50% off since it is a
non-profit institution and does not add any commission and what is left is
nothing but my plain artist price, the lowest I could provide without
tarnishing my reputation and hopefully not offending those who bought my works
at its normal prices, which includes gallery commissions. I should be insulted
because it was really quite a hassle to provide the artworks when I could have
spent those lost days working on my solo show collection, then be told it will
not sell. I simply explained that I couldn’t change the price because I have a
standard price that I follow that is equivalent to my reputation as an artist,
that it is okay that it won’t sell but didn’t really say that I already know it
won’t because there is no real market or collectors visiting the gallery.
I just got my pieces back and I’m happy I got it back
because I could sell it in other places. I merely waited for the time to pass
and look at the events as mere flows and drama that I shouldn’t get too
attached to. That the reality of the world outside and inside the temple may
provide different meanings to my career as an artist but are both essentially
empty and illusory in Buddhist views.
For the next ten days, I am giving my time to the temple
but the problem is that the people in the temple don’t know how to manage time
and the volunteer’s time. Yesterday, I have spent the whole day waiting for the
task and since none came, I just decided to catch up on 80s and 90s movies like
“Say Anything” and “Clueless”.
I designed the cover for the student handbook and I was
told the layout of the content as well. I waited for the content that I will
layout and none came. It wasn’t quite a productive day for me though I had fun
watching movies but I just feel that I could really help and that are not
tapping the time available I am providing them because I won’t be there all the
time. Today, I decided to just go and buy materials for my artworks and stay at
a friend’s house to bake some cookies and cook lovely vegetarian burgers.
I have left word that should there be any work to be
done, to email me and I shall do it and submit at the end of the day.
I do believe that there is quite a language barrier to
some and to make matters worse, there is also a lack of communication among
volunteers.
I talked to one of the volunteers on how I think that
people working in the are content with mediocrity and that they are not pushing
for the full potential when the temple and its resources can actually reach so
much. The volunteer answered by saying that it may not be mediocrity, it may be
incapacity on their end to provide better results and not the satisfaction for
mediocrity.
I saw how unorganized the system is and is quite a struggle
to provide great work in. There was also a minor thing that irked me at the
beginning because volunteers we’re provided a quarter to stay in but there was
a lack in electric fans and we were not provided with any. The evenings were
hot and it is quite hard to get some sleep and I bugged almost everyone about
the fan where one of the volunteer’s said let the temple worry about it and
that I shouldn’t worry about it.
So I decided to follow the volunteer’s advice, but
nothing happened. There was still no electric fan, I tried not to complain and
get some sleep but couldn’t.
When the volunteer who told me not to worry about it came
to the quarters, she couldn’t care for a bit whether I could get some shut eye
or not. I had to borrow a fan from the outside in order to get some comfort. I
wonder how these people look at volunteers, like slaves?
That being a volunteer one should prepare to give time
and money in the process. Maybe I still haven’t understood this Bodhisattva
thing and I am only here willing to help what I could and I wonder if it’s too
much to ask for a comfortable sleep at night for payment. Am I wrong to think
that people should help the help that they receive, because this is a give and
take situation. I thought that we all volunteer and help one another for a
common goal, that we would like to achieve full potential that can provide and
strong foundation for free education in the Philippines. Yet, the reality of
how things were, are not that ideal because not all of us believe the same.
In the world of volunteer work, when everyone is there
for the intention of goodness and sacrificing one’s time, the skill available
of these people aren’t always excellent in levels. Often it falls under mediocrity
and certain incapacities. People think what they are doing is good enough
because an excellent work doesn’t equal a greater individual reward, they
forget that great effort exerted will result not in high-payment or recognition
but actually the goodness and welfare of the many that needs it. People are
still trapped in this egoistic shell that prevents them from doing a better
work than they are currently offering. It seemed that some of them are merely
doing those things haphazardly because they were placed in that position
without the talent to account for.
It was more on circumstance than the will, ability, and
spirit.
People also working in such an environment have no
recourse but patience and tolerance.
