Tuesday, August 19, 2014

I Don't See Dead People

There is certain difficulty in organizing oneself to see another person at a specific location nowadays. 

Recently, friends I haven't seen in years, let alone heard from suddenly dropped lines and dared to say hello. Though the friendship is not dead, it just didn't occur to me to message them about anything. Life for each of us have separated, leading to different places.

These people have asked to meet or see each other over tea or  alcohol. I obliged, like the good friend I was. The thing is, these people would set the date and initiative to meet yet cancel on the day itself or the day before. Some ask to meet for some reason but would never really set the time to. How come friends don't even know how to keep their words anymore. Maybe that's why I don't see them anymore.

There was a friend of mine who contacted me out of the blue to borrow  money. She said that bills are piling up and that their electricity will get the cut, that they got short of cash because their grandma was taken to the hospital. 
This is a person who live with her girlfriend and both have work. I on the other hand, is an artist living as frugal as possible but I'm not squandering to get money to pay my bills. I have to thank our ancestral house for that. 

I have long decided to carefully select the friends to see. I realized I don't need a lot of friends but a few good quality ones are enough. 

I have also been picky with messages to respond to. I think I am too articulate that I couldn't find the words to respond to "Hey" or "Howdy". I think responding with how my week went is an overwhelming response. I decided to just leave messages like that alone and lonely. 

Also because these one word messages come from people who would respond to "Hello" after four days of sending the message. Maybe after a year we would have conversed a full sentence. It just defeats the convenience of instant messengers when responses aren't instant. Words become food left out to rot.
These people have died to me, they die when I no longer hear their voices or see even their shadows. And I too perhaps die to them. I should be summoned with a Ouija board if they wish to communicate.

I'm glad to have friends who are easy to talk to. Who fulfill their words, or calls to cancel a meeting. I'm glad to have those few friends who have kept their common decency. I love those friends who are never too busy to see me, or let me crash in their place. Who make time to just hang out despite busy schedules.